The Expat’s Guide to Dress For Success
(Bonus: Acquiring Bicultural Vision)
Spring is sprung, at least in my region. True, there will still be some cold, grey, wintry days to be endured as we wait for the Spring Equinox, one month from now. However, the winter/spring balance will continue to inexorably shift toward the warmer, friendlier season coming up.
This week’s article, drawn from the archives, presents an imminently practical aspect of the expat experience, actual travel attire. For a more metaphysical treatment of the transition, what I call acquiring bicultural vision, look at the excerpt from an upcoming book following the main topic.
But before anything else, please consider making a brief stop at my Buy Me A Coffee page to support this weekly outpouring of wit and wisdom.
*******************************’
The Expat’s Guide to Dress For Success
Here is one seemingly trivial item for you to consider – what will you wear on the flight? Let’s assume you will be sitting in several airports and on planes for many hours as you fly across the time zones. If you are going through an obstacle course of four airports and three flights, what you wear can be far from trivial. First and foremost, wear slip-on shoes for obvious reasons. On my first trans-Pacific flight, I thoughtlessly wore heavy boots. Not the most comfortable fashion choice when sitting in a cramped space for long periods.
Next, purchase a small sports bag – a pouch, not a backpack or a fanny pack. Get the kind that comes with a long strap for wearing over your shoulder. Be sure the strap is long enough to go over your head, not just hang down from your shoulder. This makes it much harder for a street-corner criminal to approach you from behind, simply slip the bag off your shoulder, and run away while you watch helplessly (but not wordlessly). In this pouch, you carry everything you will need during the trip: passport and other important docs, boarding pass, phone, Kindle, cash in appropriate currencies, glasses, sunglasses, snacks, keys, medicines, and tissues. Yes, if possible, cash, in addition to credit/debit cards. I mean real cash, i.e., paper money. Don’t rely on using your phone to pay for purchases. Carry enough of the local currency for unknown expenses after you step off the plane. Unexpected airport taxes – Don’t ask how I know. - coffee shops between flights, and emergency McDonald’s refuelings may not accept your old currency. If you have any space left, you can throw in a few packets of instant coffee or tea bags and a spoon. Add other items as your personal desires and space warrant.
Now, with some reservations, let me introduce you to the Ultimate Traveler’s Ensemble. You may think this next idea is the height of silliness but I assure you I am being serious. I have had multiple comfortable flight experiences while wearing my Big Smith overalls. (Warning: If you follow this advice, you will be in serious danger of looking like a nerd. But do you really care if the total strangers in Seats 40A and 40B wonder if you are a lost farmer who somehow wandered onto an international flight?) When I say overalls, I do not mean those distressed, flimsy, tony outfits that fashion-conscious young women don for mall expeditions between photo shoots. I mean the real thing - genuine overalls with multiple deep pockets including breast pockets with pencil loops, heavy-duty hardware, no beltline, and tough, durable, comfortable denim fabric. The multiple deep pockets can even take the overflow from your pouch. I’m not sure which feature is most important but, if you are going to be hanging around several airports or slouched in a cramped plane seat for many hours, the lack of a waistline with belt loops or even an elastic waistband has to be near the top of the list. With loose bib overalls, you can even slip your sports pouch inside the bib, making it inaccessible to a thief.
One more thing. Consider packing your own flight meals. Liquids are heavy and often verboten so a fine, crisp, properly chilled Chablis is usually out of the question… but a smoked salmon sandwich on homemade bread, stuffed eggs, and a really good potato salad will make you the envy of the economy seat crowd. Finally, even at the risk of a mild overdose, maybe one last binge on your favorite shrimp nachos or their equivalent. It may be a long time… trust me on this one.
A final bonus for wearing overalls on a plane is that it will be easy for someone waiting for you at your destination to pick you out of the flood of arriving passengers. Besides, it all depends on how you carry yourself. Many people might conclude that anyone who can intentionally dress that poorly must actually be rich… and they will subsequently treat you like a celebrity caught slumming. This is especially true if you followed my suggestion about bringing your own first-class picnic lunch for elegant dining at 30,000 feet. But stay in character as an eccentric but friendly plutocrat. Insist (politely, of course) that the Chablis be properly chilled.
Of course, your mileage may vary. Follow or reject this sartorial advice as you wish. For years, when I made my annual summer vacation pilgrimage back to my hometown, my father used to be mortified when I trooped off the plane in my Big Smiths. But for me, if I have to tackle an international obstacle course through four airports and three flights, utility is more important than appearance.
************************************************’
Bonus
The following is an excerpt from a not-yet-published book with the working title of The Expat Has Landed. Hope you enjoy this thought exercise.
Bicultural Vision
The recipe for becoming an expat has two ingredients. The first is the physical relocation to a new country, a new culture. It must be new, not merely a geographical shift within the same culture. That part is easy enough to achieve: Just buy a plane ticket, pack a couple of suitcases, and catch your flight. (Exactly what you will do after you arrive is often a mystery but at least you will be on the ground in your new country.) The second ingredient, however, is a little more complicated. You must, after arrival and getting settled into your new lifestyle, allow yourself sufficient time to develop what I call bicultural vision. This new perspective cannot be purchased, obtained through reading, or rushed through quickly. Acculturation is not merely getting past jet lag; it cannot be minimized.
Imagine you decide to take piano lessons. You must start at the lowest skill level and, even with assiduous daily practice, it is unreasonable to expect to become proficient in a few weeks. You can shorten the process of becoming a piano player by diligent effort and hours spent - what actors call “stage time” - and you can surround yourself with companions and the accouterments of that lifestyle… but you cannot compress the process. The same is true of becoming an expat. And, like the piano metaphor, hopefully, you will enjoy each stage along the path to becoming a legitimate expat.
For, you see, that second ingredient, bicultural vision, is the acid test of expatdom and it comes only when you have spent sufficient time in a new culture. How do you know when you have transitioned? One simple answer: What you look out your new window and what you see has become normal, you are well on your way. Or, when you find yourself saying, “I wonder what they are doing tonight back in (hometown). It certainly wouldn’t look anything like this”.
One caveat for those who have not yet made the leap: Acquiring this bicultural vision comes with a price. Specifically, you will find it impossible to communicate with the folks who never left their hometown or their home culture, the monoculturalists. Even friends who knew the old you will be mystified by some of the things the new you says and believes. Try to imagine a soldier returning home after a tour of combat duty. Often those soldiers will say that only another vet can truly understand them.
****************************’
If this generous serving of practical and metaphysical verbiage, requiring the sacrifice of countless electrons to create my weekly digital newsletter is of value to you, please show me how valuable by stopping by my Buy Me A Coffee page. Your non-tax-deductible contributions are truly appreciated.
Wearing bib overalls on an international flight is genius...but I'm still not going there!