A Strange Tribe, Part 6
The Conclusion... for now
Reflections are an appropriate way to end this series. It has been a story of a most unlikely combination of unusual circumstances, seized opportunities, and X-hybrid genes. As my son prepares to enter the next phase of his life, a period in which he will have a greater voice in determining his path into the future, we should keep in mind that famous statement by Earl Nightengale: We live today in a golden age, an age that mankind (and womankind) has dreamed of and worked toward throughout human history. There are abundant opportunities around us - and lots of little goodies that make our life so comfortable and, indeed, almost effortless if we wish. While it is impossible to predict with confidence what will happen in the coming years, you can be pretty sure it’s gonna be interesting. Therefore, in conclusion…
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So, as my son grows up and prepares for adult life, he is accumulating a most unusual blend of characteristics, education, and experiences. In his lifetime, CS must have heard a thousand times, “Baba, Mama, Qiao Qiao. We are family.” Everything else is fluid and contextual but the nuclear family is his solid foundation. It offers a mobile stability equivalent to Hemingway’s description of Paris as “a moveable feast”. Indeed, CS has learned that our health and our close relationships are the only enduring factors in our lives. Everything else is simply rules that we learn - and my son is realizing that, if he had grown up in a different place or generation, he would have learned different rules… and he still can.
And what about the next generation? In a rapidly changing world, how many of our strange tribe’s current customs, attitudes, and expectations will he pass along to my grandchildren? And where will they live? Perhaps the pendulum will swing back and that future generation will decide that stability in the form of roots in a local community and culture are better than a nomadic existence. Douglas Adams, in The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, observed that most people, when they get a first glimpse of the immensity of the universe, spend the rest of their lives trying to forget that disturbing vastness. Similarly, perhaps our family’s next generation will choose the comfortable conformity of provincialism.
Sometimes, as an elder of this three-member strange tribe, I try to remember Life Before CS. Looking backward through the filter of parental eyes, it seems rather colorless and superficial. Then I try to imagine my present life if it didn’t include Chester. Yes, I might be waking up in a small “clean, quiet, and orderly” house on the beach on Hainan Island, deciding if I wanted to go fishing before or after breakfast. I could be quite happy, I think, living in China’s Hawaii with tropical fruits, tropical flowers, tropical breezes, and tropical girls. But without CS? No, I don’t think so. I wouldn’t trade my current life with anyone in the world. The Chinese have a phrase, “painful happiness”, that summarizes the generational experience. How apt. What a joy CS has been… mostly. And how much enlightenment he has brought about also. Thus I am perfectly happy in my role as the senior member of our strange tribe, waiting to see what new adventures await us.
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This segment concludes the history of our Strange Tribe. But, as Thor Heyerdahl said, “For every minute, the future is becoming the past!” Sure, you can make plans. I encourage you to do so. It is wise to visualize and plan in great detail how you will achieve your goals. But you must remember to be flexible in your thinking. Even in our family’s relatively stable situation currently, we end each proposed plan with the phrase UPC. (Unless Plans Change.) In this rapidly changing world, what will happen next is anyone’s guess. But I can be pretty sure it’s gonna be interesting.
If this combination of family drama, personal history, pure speculation, and attempts at humor have intrigued you - at least enough to read a few thousand words - please show your appreciation by stopping by my Buy Me A Coffee page and make a small financial gesture. And stay tuned in this space for further articles of expat adventures, lifestyle, and mindset. (Beats honest work.)